Police Wrestling Accreditation

Check it out!! STERLING AND ALEX RIGHT HERE ON THE INTERWEB!!! Postin’ a new blog before even a month has gone by!!! Record breaking time!

Once upon a time there were two devilishly handsome young men living on an enchanted island somewhere in the deep blue sea, west of an imaginary time altering line. There, they worked as masons laying the bricks of knowledge into the foundations of small children’s minds. Some would say they were minstrels of intelligence weaving melodies of mathematics through the noggins of the youth. On one bright day, a team of knights from the mystical kingdom of Guam came to test the young men and their fellow minstrels of knowledge to determine whether the good king could bestow upon the school the high honor of AAA Accreditation. After surmounting many obstacles and facing numerous challenges, Yap SDA School received a three year accreditation!!!! YAY!!!!

This be Alex. Yarr. In case you missed something, Sterling was trying to say that the Adventist Accreditation Association threw six people onto Yap to act as an accreditation board. We didn’t get raving reviews; in fact, the board was quick to point out a myriad of things we could fix or improve. However, we did get a good enough score to net three years more as an accredited school.

Last week, one of Sterling the Chivalrous’s students invited him to wrestling practice. On Thursday, Seth, Sterling, and I hopped into the back of a white truck filled with jolly islanders and set off across the island to wrestle. As you all know, we invented wrestling, so we were right at home at practice. We went through a crazy routine of rolling, sprinting, and using each other as mini jungle-gyms. Stretching consisted of a combination of dancing and punching your muscles. After getting to the actual wrestling exercises, we played an interesting game of “duck, duck, goose.” Instead of trying to tag the other person, you slapped him until he found a place to lie down. It’s too bad that we won’t be here for the Micronesian Olympics. There’s no question that they could use our technique and raw power.

Sterling again. Now that we’re done talking about all those serious things, I’d like to take a few minutes to write you a comical little story that happened to us just a few days ago.

On Sunday morning, Scott, Alex, and I hoped into the school’s green sedan and sped off toward the prison to sing some songs and have a small worship service. After we had finished at the jail, we all climbed back into the car and started back to the school. Alex graciously offered to let Scott drive even though he doesn’t have a license. We figured, being that we were on Yap, no one would give us any trouble. We were wrong. Scott missed a stop sign and suddenly lights appeared behind us. Scott pulled out a shot gun and shot the tires out of the police car. Then he pushed the bat button and our car began to soar through the air. Actually, I guess that didn’t happen. We just pulled over. I tried to switch seats with Scott but realized that I didn’t have my license on me and neither did Alex who had driven us to the prison. The police officer turned out to be a friend who works at the local hardware store as well as a firefighter and cop. We sat on the side of the road for about 20 minutes in our cool little sedan with Yap SDA printed in block letters on the side. All our students drove by and laughed at us. The officer gave us a citation and drove our car back to the station. The citation was pretty cool because it had a list of about 20 different mistakes you could make like running a stop sign, driving intoxicated, driving without a tail light, and so on. We got two checks for missing the stop sign and driving without a license, but no matter how many checks you got, the fine was still just $20. Back to the story, I went into the station to make my one phone call. There I phoned the school office to get someone to pick us up. Unfortunately, since it was Sunday, no one was in the office and that was the only number any of us knew. In the end our cop friend drove us back home. It was all quite an adventure.

Ooh-de-lally! Alexander here. What we say in our blog is 100% true, 30% of the time. I hope our loving audience appreciates our imaginative, immature, yet semi-accurate accounts of what goes on here. A last note: we still appreciate your emails, packages, and calls. We don’t have much time left here. “Only 22 school days left,” the German was informing us today. Looking back, we see how much some of you have done for us, and we are very grateful. You can’t have our firstborn sons, but we will gladly give you our thanks. Thanks much.